I left sunny Vegas on monday and arrived back in sunny (unbelievably so) London early this morning. It is good to be back but I had a wicked time in Sin City and caused havoc in true Vickers style, back to the old sko0ol.
I arrived the first day and it was blazing, 80 at least, not a cloud in the sky, awesome. I checked into my hotel, The Monte Carlo. It's ideally situated and comfortable so I was happy. I had a few hours to kill waiting for my pals to arrive and went to have a mooch about and get my bearings again. The first thing I noticed was that it was way quieter than when Ricky Hatton's barmy army were in town. My friends called me to announce their arrival and I took over a bottle of VC to the MGM grand to start as we meant to go on. We popped the champers and wished Andy a happy birthday then went for dinner. We decided on the mexican we ate in before the fight last year as it was lovely back then. Big mistake, the food was awful this time around. I was all dolled up and ready to party but the team weren't having it and let me down and went to bed at 9pm. 9pm in Vegas is a very poor effort, gutted. With no one to party with I decided to hit the sack, could I sleep, could I fuck. I rolled out of my huge and extremely comfortable bed at about 7 and went to play a bit of poker. Did well in my first session, ended up $100. It's way harder to get the dough than when the drunken mancs were in town for the Hatton fight.
Had a lovely breakfast in the Venettion Hotel, poached eggs, hash brown, toast, bacon, sausages and gammon- boooooooooom. That's what I'm talking about, no wonder yanks are fat!! Had another winning poker session there too, but it was hard work. I have never played against such miserable fuckers in my life. I was in high spirits and couldn't get anyone to get into a conversation, I told all my best jokes, no reaction, that's some quality comedy material. I knew I was in trouble then. Wasn't all bad though, had a couple of arguments with locals, mainly because they didn't like the baby faced poker assassin taking there cash, check me the fuck out. As expected I rose to the bait and enjoyed the mud slinging with gusto. That night I was sure we were going to have a big night out but once again my lightweight buddy let me down. I hit the town with his brother in law, a lovely fella, only 22 and a broad scouser who doesn't like talking to people he doesn't know!! I got talking to a lovely latina chick, the accent just blows me away!! We had a good evening knocking back Tequilla's and all kinds of horrible shit. Then me and Ed decided to go looking for some further action on the strip. Outside the Bellagio I decided it was a perfect photo oppourtunity, in my pissed as a ferret state I tried to climb onto the wall and pose for a shot. My balance betrayed me and I was there like a cartoon character, arms windmilling trying to save myself from the inevitable. Then it was all over, I toppled backwards and crashed into a huge, prickly bush. Fortunately the bush saved me from total immersion in the pond. I dragged myself out and brushed myself off ready to crack on. That's Vegas baby!!
The next night was even crazier, I was having a drink with Ed in the MGM grand bar when he decided that he was tired. Now I wouldn't mind but he's 22 and had done fuck all except shopping all day and it was only midnight. I was cool though cos' I had buddied up with this crazy mexican dude and we were gonna party, it's Sin city not fucking sleep city!!! So me and my knew pal ended up in The Hardrock, where I encountered some of the most beautiful but pretentious women I have ever had the msfortune of meeting. I will go into this more on another post as it really grips my shit and deserves it's own page!! That place shut and I went to the Wynn, I was alone by this stage but made a couple of new friends there!! I then decided it would be a good idea to play blackjack at my hotel. It was a right laugh, the table was fun and I was on top form, they should have been paying me for my standup comedy, eventhough I couldn't stand up by this stage. I somehow left the table up on money. I had to ask someone the time as I had lost my watch during my dive into the Bellagio pond. When they told me it was midday I nearly fell off my stool. I had been drinking for 16 hrs, time for bed me thinks. By this stage I wouldn't class it as drinking, more like pouring it everywhere other than in my mouth. My white shirt had plenty of vodka and cranberry down it on inspection the next day. I will continue this tomorrow, i am feeling ill just thinking about that night, binge drinking at it's best/worst.
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